"Fear and Vulnerability" September 23, 2018

Psalm 31: 10-31 Mark 9: 30-37 A close friend described to me the other day, that all other people ever see of us is this little bit. We live in fear, hiding what is really going on behind 4 letter words like: FINE, OKAY, GOOD. We encounter so many people every day, if we actually knew what each were thinking, the fears of one another, if we did not have filters on what we see and what we hear, we would be overwhelmed. So we witness and know only this little bit about our families, colleagues, neighbors, friends. In a world where there are cameras on computers, in elevators, in traffic lights, we try in vain to control what others know about us. Christianity is unique from other religions, which focus on Atonement, Morality, Reincarnation; Christianity’s goal in this life and in life ever-lasting is Absolute Communion, not simply the elements of Bread and Wine, but letting down our guard, openly sharing our thoughts and desires, trusting we will be accepted and loved. We seek forgiveness, we confess our sins, in order that we not inflict our imperfections and dirt on one another. But to be one with God, in harmony with life and everyone in it, what greater goal could there be? A year ago, our Wednesday evening Bible Study group read the book of Proverbs. The difficulty is that this is not a narrative like the Torah and Gospels, not the Visions of a Prophet, not a Letter from an old friend. Proverbs are just that, very brief wisdom sayings, that offer meaning to life. We imagined the thousands of years of life farming, where you would take one proverb as you went out into the world for the day, and repeat it over and over, working on that thought like a prayer all day long. There is also a tradition that the Book of Proverbs are the teachings of a royal couple, a King and Queen to their child coming of age, imparting wisdom about God and Life; Here, about what he should look for in a partner. A difficulty of language, is that in Hebrew the word for WOMAN is the word WIFE because every Wife happens to be a WOMAN, but not every woman is a wife. Orthodox Judaism requires that you are Jewish only if your mother was Jewish. Religion is not something in your DNA, but imparted in small doses in the foods we eat, the songs we sing, the prayers we learn, the stories we were taught before anything else. I had a friend who was an old Rabbi, who described that every Sabbath beginning at sundown Friday, the woman of the house lit the candles and served a sacred meal, during which the family pray to recall that God is God, not us. God is the maker of the Universe, and Ultimate ruler of our lives. And in recognition of the woman of the house, the father at the table, recites Proverb 31, ending by speaking directly to his wife in thanksgiving for her, and to do so every week. While this little Gem is among the best known of all proverbs, what intrigues me in this, is that the Woman is far more than a Stepford Wife on Steroids. Proverbs 31 does not mention her looks. Is she comely, voluptuous, what my father used to call Zoftik, does she have the Piercing eyes of Rachel or the Soft eyes of Leah, blonde, brunet, redhead, young or seasoned? Instead, the reader describes her character, this is a woman who can bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan! However, an unexpected quality of her is what in Hebrew is named “CHAYIL”, some translate this as VALIANT, some as FAITHFULLY HONEST, some as COURAGEOUS, when the literal Hebrew meaning is: POSSESSING The STRENGTH OF A WARRIOR. But what sets her apart from all others and makes her who she is, is that she knows and fears only one thing: the Lord. According to Mark’s Gospel, the disciples had shared in all of life with Jesus for years, they had listened to his sermons, and had him explain and interpret them. The 12 had witnessed his healings and miracles. They had stood up with him in confronting the Pharisees and Elders. Simon Peter had even confessed that Jesus is the Messiah sent from God, the anointed one to save the world. But still they knew only that little bit, and could not understand, even feared who he was, the meaning of being the Christ. Years ago, there was a joke in this Church, that we did not want a Co-Pastor, or Interim Pastor, or Associate Pastor, but a REAL PASTOR. How could he explain, not only am I willing to devote my life to you, but I give my life for you? We do not like talking about Death, Endings. We often times respond with Fear, trying to take control, to lead, to be strong. I was talking with a group of Medical students at Doug’s last evening, who asked for strength to take on the responsibilities before them. But what they needed was vulnerability. Spouses concerned about the future of their marriages, and bearing with their partner in medical illnesses, who ask for strength, but need vulnerability. It takes a different kind of strength to be vulnerable. Many of us are like beginning swimmers, who out fear, exert wasted energy and thrash about trying vainly to stay afloat. The more confident swimmer, rests effortlessly on the water, allowing their nose to break the surface, only to breathe when needed, but otherwise trusts that the water will keep us afloat. Strength in our world is confused with Power often confused with coercion. Can I exert enough Physical, Economic. Social or Political pressure on the other, or on a situation, in order to make them follow my will? Jesus knew what the disciples had been arguing about before asking the question. James and John were brothers, the sons of Zebedee, and like siblings always contesting for who is strongest, who is greatest. Jesus turned their power paradigm on its head. The model of greatness in the kingdom of Heaven, is a powerless child. When I first went to South Sudan, I recall John’s Father stating “We do not need you to come here and do things for us as Americans.” He took a 1 year old child and holding out his finger assisted the child to rise and stand. He said, “All we need is someone to give us a steadying hand of reassurance as we learn to walk.” When we are in crisis, filled with fear, seeking power, control, strength, we cannot listen to hear each other. When we make the effort to really listen, not trying to answer, not trying to control, but to listen… then, we find something each of us can identify with – all of us have a frightened child within. Children, even before they have words, have an ability to communicate with a common language, because they have no roles to play, no prestige or wealth or power to lose. The real irony of this passage is Jesus knows he is going to the Cross to die, and James and John ask to be at his right and left sides, which instead of power, became the position of the two Criminals who also were crucified.