"Who Are You?" September 30, 2018

Esther 7 Mark 9: 38-50 Who are you? No, who are you really? How do you want people to remember you? Do you define yourself by your age? By your accomplishments? By your family? By significant experiences in your life? At one point, I came to recognize that from the time we get working papers, until we die, we describe ourselves in 1-3 page Resumes, as Pastors a 14 page PIF. Then because our family have to pay per letter, they reduce who we are to an obituary; lifted up verbally in a 30 to 60 minute memorial. After which, our entire existence, who we are, is reduced to “The Dash” between our date of birth/death on headstones, a begat in Genealogies. When our youngest son was on the Wrestling Team, I remember Coach Dick Campbell and Coach Tim Green describing that who you are is part of “This Team,” within the church we call that “The Body of Christ.” They described that in wrestling you can get points for showing up, for taking someone else down, for breaking a hold, for a pin, but the most points are awarded for a Reversal, when you surprise everyone, because you had been held down in a hold and you reversed everything. Being true to who we are when life reverses is what our readings are about. The Book of Esther is unique, it is the only book in the Canon of Scripture that never explicitly names God, the Torah, the Temple, or the Law. It is in the Bible because the Book of Esther is the basis for the season of Purim, 10 Banquets in August, which tell the story of reversal from genocide to Salvation. Historically, after Chaldea conquered Judah, Babylon was itself conquered by Persia, and King Xerses believing the Enemy of my Enemy must be my friend, released the Jews paying them a severance to return to rebuild their lives in Israel. However some remained behind in Persia. Accordingly the Book of Esther is written as a Melodrama, King Xerses here also known by the name Ahasuerus, was seen as such a fool for letting go the Jews, and so prideful of all he possessed, that one day gave a Banquet for everyone to see how much he had. Therefore whenever the names of King Xerses or Ahasuerus are pronounced the congregation is to respond with: “Duh!” At this banquet, he tried to have all the Emperors and Kings witness how powerful he was by displaying the beauty of his wife Queen Vashti, having her appear Nude. She naturally refused, No One could stand up to the King, so Xerses had her killed. Wanting to have the most beautiful wife in the Persian Empire, King Xerses had the World’s First Beauty Pageant. Esther was a Jewish orphan, whose Uncle was named Mordecai. Mordecai is the hero of the story, so when we hear his name we cheer! Mordecai, adopts Esther as his own daughter, and enters her in the beauty pageant, without revealing she is Jewish, and of course she wins. So when Esther is named, we WolfWhistle. One day, Mordecai overhears the guards plotting to kill King Xerses, and Mordecai tells Esther, who tells King Xerses saving the king from assassination, which of course is then forgotten by King Ahasuerus. The Villain of this story is the Grand Vizer: Haman, who like every villain is Boo-ed. The Grand Vizer Haman is angered because whenever he appears in public everyone is supposed to bow down to him, but Mordecai refuses to bow down. In anxiety, the Grand Vizer Haman not only has a Gallows built 150 feet tall immediately next to his house so he can watch when Mordecai is executed, he also creates a policy that all Jews be executed the same day as a genocide, of course having this unwittingly signed by King Xerses. Being a farce, King Xerses has a law that anyone trying to see him without permission will be killed, so Esther sends a dinner invitation to Xerses and Haman, so that she can ask a favor. Like a shaggy-dog story, at that dinner, the favor she asks is that they will come to dinner again the next night, so she can ask another favor. At that dinner, you have this morning’s reading of Chapter 7. Esther who was an Orphan, reverses to become the Queen, the Jewish people who were to be exterminated in genocide find salvation. Haman who was Prime Minister and plotted against everyone, is executed on his own gallows outside his own home. Mordecai goes from being on death row, to becoming Prime Minister. And the King, who was naïve to everything taking place around him, still is King Ahasuerus: “Duh!” The Gospel reading and the rest of our sermon are filled with just as many reversals, but nothing humorous. The Gospel writer is making the point that from the time of the early Church, there have been different denominations, expectations and groups dis-agreeing. The Disciple John comes to Jesus proud that he told the Catholics, Mormons and Pentecostals that they were not following Jesus in Presbyterian Decency and Good Order. To which Jesus says, “NO!” Painfully, we live in such a polarized society that people believe whomever is not for us is against us; when one of the sayings of Jesus is “whomever is not against us, is for us.” There always seem to be those trying to control and anxiously keep others out. What I hear Jesus instructing is that rather than cutting off and judging others, ethical questions are for each of us, to examine our own hearts and souls. As your pastor I have tried to live my life with integrity, humility and transparency. Therefore the following letter is being sent out to all your homes. One on one, in meetings, in worship, in the community, I have always tried to be the same person, to answer any questions people asked, with truth. I believe it is easier that way, because I do not have to remember what I said. I have loved you, trusted you, and I have been loved and trusted by you, for that I am truly thankful. There is nothing wrong, no one committed any offense, there are no longer secrets. We have shared the joy of being pastor with you for 22 years. In that time, we have witnessed miracles, we have made a difference in this community, in the world, in each others’ lives. I have never tried to impose my will or direction on anyone, or to tell the church what I Want, instead I have sought to walk with you and lead you where you have wanted to go, as gracefully, faithfully and as effectively as possible. Since January our Session and I have talked about the church’s needs for the future and for transition. At times, this has felt like my being a terminal patient, as people tiptoed around me to be certain I had not died yet, while others have been unaware anything was going on! I do not know if I will be called to another Church or if I will need a Severance package from you for us to survive. Announcing this, not knowing, is truly a leap of faith. I am thankful for having been able to serve you faithfully and effectively throughout all our years and will do so as long as I am your pastor. Most of us will find this news of transition upsetting, as we do not like to have our routines disturbed, our plans, expectations upset. All of which also makes the wounds of separation painful. This is as difficult for me to leave being your pastor, as it is for you to accept. Some have reacted during this time, with crisis and anxiety, but we described all of this being expected years ago. I am confident this church is in the hands of The Session, Deacons, and those who lead us in the worship of God: Bruce, Brian and Sue, as well as Lori, Peggy and Eddie, who will continue to support you just as they did in partnership and laughter with me. We profess being Christians. The core belief of Christianity being that we own death as necessary to life, even more, that death is essential for resurrection to be appreciated. Over the next several weeks there will be opportunities for us to share stories and to try to develop closure. October 21st immediately after worship, we will have a Special Congregational Meeting to act upon how to formally end our pastoral relationship. At 5pm on Sunday, October 21st we will have a special worship service followed by a dinner for our congregation, our community and Presbytery, to celebrate and give thanks for our journey together in this pastorate. Years ago, Gail Banks had a cartoon of a Deliveryman delivering a large crate asking where she wanted the new Pastor Installed! This worship service will be our “un-installing,” a memorial service to give thanks to God for what we have shared, to laugh, to cry, to be real with one another. After October 21st Judy and I plan to sell our home and move, we will maintain contact as friends (you are very dear to us) but I need to leave, for the church to be able to continue to thrive. Also, I am still young enough to hope to have the fun of doing this yet one more time! 25 years ago, members of another church I served, began writing in a book that I hope you will make the effort to sign, with remembrances and stories of the faith we have shared. I have already cut all my ties as your pastor with the John Dau Foundation, the Fire Department, and Presbytery responsibilities. On October 22nd , I will no longer be part of this church, talking with you about the needs, joys or problems of this church, officiating at Baptisms, Weddings or Funerals. But I hope and pray you will redouble your commitments, because the church will need to build on the foundation established. With love, I Am Craig Lindsey

"Fear and Vulnerability" September 23, 2018

Psalm 31: 10-31 Mark 9: 30-37 A close friend described to me the other day, that all other people ever see of us is this little bit. We live in fear, hiding what is really going on behind 4 letter words like: FINE, OKAY, GOOD. We encounter so many people every day, if we actually knew what each were thinking, the fears of one another, if we did not have filters on what we see and what we hear, we would be overwhelmed. So we witness and know only this little bit about our families, colleagues, neighbors, friends. In a world where there are cameras on computers, in elevators, in traffic lights, we try in vain to control what others know about us. Christianity is unique from other religions, which focus on Atonement, Morality, Reincarnation; Christianity’s goal in this life and in life ever-lasting is Absolute Communion, not simply the elements of Bread and Wine, but letting down our guard, openly sharing our thoughts and desires, trusting we will be accepted and loved. We seek forgiveness, we confess our sins, in order that we not inflict our imperfections and dirt on one another. But to be one with God, in harmony with life and everyone in it, what greater goal could there be? A year ago, our Wednesday evening Bible Study group read the book of Proverbs. The difficulty is that this is not a narrative like the Torah and Gospels, not the Visions of a Prophet, not a Letter from an old friend. Proverbs are just that, very brief wisdom sayings, that offer meaning to life. We imagined the thousands of years of life farming, where you would take one proverb as you went out into the world for the day, and repeat it over and over, working on that thought like a prayer all day long. There is also a tradition that the Book of Proverbs are the teachings of a royal couple, a King and Queen to their child coming of age, imparting wisdom about God and Life; Here, about what he should look for in a partner. A difficulty of language, is that in Hebrew the word for WOMAN is the word WIFE because every Wife happens to be a WOMAN, but not every woman is a wife. Orthodox Judaism requires that you are Jewish only if your mother was Jewish. Religion is not something in your DNA, but imparted in small doses in the foods we eat, the songs we sing, the prayers we learn, the stories we were taught before anything else. I had a friend who was an old Rabbi, who described that every Sabbath beginning at sundown Friday, the woman of the house lit the candles and served a sacred meal, during which the family pray to recall that God is God, not us. God is the maker of the Universe, and Ultimate ruler of our lives. And in recognition of the woman of the house, the father at the table, recites Proverb 31, ending by speaking directly to his wife in thanksgiving for her, and to do so every week. While this little Gem is among the best known of all proverbs, what intrigues me in this, is that the Woman is far more than a Stepford Wife on Steroids. Proverbs 31 does not mention her looks. Is she comely, voluptuous, what my father used to call Zoftik, does she have the Piercing eyes of Rachel or the Soft eyes of Leah, blonde, brunet, redhead, young or seasoned? Instead, the reader describes her character, this is a woman who can bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan! However, an unexpected quality of her is what in Hebrew is named “CHAYIL”, some translate this as VALIANT, some as FAITHFULLY HONEST, some as COURAGEOUS, when the literal Hebrew meaning is: POSSESSING The STRENGTH OF A WARRIOR. But what sets her apart from all others and makes her who she is, is that she knows and fears only one thing: the Lord. According to Mark’s Gospel, the disciples had shared in all of life with Jesus for years, they had listened to his sermons, and had him explain and interpret them. The 12 had witnessed his healings and miracles. They had stood up with him in confronting the Pharisees and Elders. Simon Peter had even confessed that Jesus is the Messiah sent from God, the anointed one to save the world. But still they knew only that little bit, and could not understand, even feared who he was, the meaning of being the Christ. Years ago, there was a joke in this Church, that we did not want a Co-Pastor, or Interim Pastor, or Associate Pastor, but a REAL PASTOR. How could he explain, not only am I willing to devote my life to you, but I give my life for you? We do not like talking about Death, Endings. We often times respond with Fear, trying to take control, to lead, to be strong. I was talking with a group of Medical students at Doug’s last evening, who asked for strength to take on the responsibilities before them. But what they needed was vulnerability. Spouses concerned about the future of their marriages, and bearing with their partner in medical illnesses, who ask for strength, but need vulnerability. It takes a different kind of strength to be vulnerable. Many of us are like beginning swimmers, who out fear, exert wasted energy and thrash about trying vainly to stay afloat. The more confident swimmer, rests effortlessly on the water, allowing their nose to break the surface, only to breathe when needed, but otherwise trusts that the water will keep us afloat. Strength in our world is confused with Power often confused with coercion. Can I exert enough Physical, Economic. Social or Political pressure on the other, or on a situation, in order to make them follow my will? Jesus knew what the disciples had been arguing about before asking the question. James and John were brothers, the sons of Zebedee, and like siblings always contesting for who is strongest, who is greatest. Jesus turned their power paradigm on its head. The model of greatness in the kingdom of Heaven, is a powerless child. When I first went to South Sudan, I recall John’s Father stating “We do not need you to come here and do things for us as Americans.” He took a 1 year old child and holding out his finger assisted the child to rise and stand. He said, “All we need is someone to give us a steadying hand of reassurance as we learn to walk.” When we are in crisis, filled with fear, seeking power, control, strength, we cannot listen to hear each other. When we make the effort to really listen, not trying to answer, not trying to control, but to listen… then, we find something each of us can identify with – all of us have a frightened child within. Children, even before they have words, have an ability to communicate with a common language, because they have no roles to play, no prestige or wealth or power to lose. The real irony of this passage is Jesus knows he is going to the Cross to die, and James and John ask to be at his right and left sides, which instead of power, became the position of the two Criminals who also were crucified.

"AfterWords" September 16, 2018

Jeremiah 4: 18-28 Mark 8: 27-38 Sunday, September 9th, 2001 we as a congregation read this passage from Jeremiah for the first time as part of the Lectionary. I knew the passage well because for Ordination, I had to translate this from Hebrew, write a 15 page research paper and Sermon on this text, all within 4 hours. Tuesday Sept 11th, the sky was a brilliant blue, when suddenly Our Reality changed. Other than the Revolutionary War, our Mainland had never been attacked by a foreign power. Since that time we have become almost accustomed to Terrorist Attacks. We have learned to take off our shoes and belts at the airport, to take cell phones and lap tops out of suitcases, that we cannot carry nail clippers, or pen knives, liquids, or aerosols, and those with artificial knees and hips may be subject to a body search pat down. On Sept 11th the Clergy of our Village had been gathered together to meet. Skip Adams had just left to become Bishop, Natalie Scholl and Deron Melville had recently arrived at the Methodist and Lutheran Churches. When we were told what happened, we prayed, then promised to worship together that evening here, then Natalie and Deron went to the Schools and I went to the Welch Allyn Factory, Father McGrath joined me there as we did grief counseling and prayed, listening to stories of family who live in NYC, or work at the Pentagon. At 2pm I was called to come lead prayer services with the telephone operators and also the engineers, and I recall recognizing that my own sons would be eligible if the Draft were activated for War. That evening, I had written prayers and all of the Clergy shared in leadership. But when I preached on this passage, it was different. At Ground Zero, the sky was black, ash was falling in snowdrifts, space seemed to ripple as temperatures shifted from extreme heat of airplane fuel fires, to extreme cold; but most difficult, no bodies were found, there was no sound, no birds, no traffic. Seventeen years later, we have learned to be suspicious. We have learned fear. We have become accustomed to Orange Alerts and Mass Killings, barriers and cameras. But have we found any redemption, any new faith, or understanding? We have returned to routines, added new ones, all rooted in fear, not based on faith. That December I wrote a piece: “This Christmas is Different.” ➢ In Christmases past, we often thought about all we did not have; this Christmas we recognized all we do possess. ➢ Christmas past we hung wreaths on doors, then placed wreaths @ cemetery. ➢ In the past we counted our 401Ks, Christmas 2001 we counted our blessings. ➢ Christmases past we paid lip service to Holidays; then began to honor them. ➢ Christmases past we gave kids toy guns, then had to teach: Guns are not toys. ➢ Christmases past we wondered how to afford all the presents, Christmas 2001 we imagined all money cant buy: Security, safety, peace. ➢ Prior Christmases, Relatives got on our nerves, then we got on our knees. ➢ Christmases past we complained about Office-stress, then offices were gone ➢ Some Christmases we wondered what it was to be affluent, then to be alive. ➢ Heroes played sports, now we know Heroes who run into burning buildings. ➢ In Christmases past we contemplated the changes we wanted to make, Christmas 2001 we began considering all the accommodations we had made. Here we are, as Survivors, each of us have nothing to lose, and everything to gain. What are we going to do with life, that we have nothing to lose by living? Frederick Buechner, was a classmate of our Veterinarian Bill Nichols who wrote the book Listening to Your Life asking questions about where we are going, and who we are: • When you look in the mirror, What do you most like and what do you not? • If you had only a brief message, 25 words or less, to leave, what would it be? • Of all the things you have done, which would you like to undo? • Which makes you the happiest to remember? • Is there anyone or any cause, you would be willing to risk your life for? • If today were the last day of your life, what would you choose to do? The things done in fear, are the ones, I would undo, the times I backed down. But the ones I am happiest about, revolve around family and faith. What I have been willing to sacrifice for, to make, amends or to accept loss for, have also been for the Family of Faith, the Church, You. Jesus went about life with his congregation, when he asked: “Who do they say I Am?” Some called him a Rabbi, some a Priest, some a Faith-Healer, some a Charlatan, some said he was Elijah Returning for a new Era, some a new Moses, some a Prophet, some said the reincarnation of John the Baptist. Andrew’s Brother Peter loved Word-Games. In Hebrew, the Name of God, the name given at the Burning Bush to Moses, “Yahweh” means “I Am,” so if Jesus asks “Who I Am” the right answer had to be God; but saying that out loud would be blasphemy because only GOD could be God, so Jesus was “sent from God” the anointed “Messiah!” in Latin “The Christ!” Jesus says “Exactly! But what does it mean to sent from God?” The Messiah is not a King, not a Warrior, not a Scholar. To come from God means to be a gift of love, of redemption and transformation for the world. Frederick Buechner, whom I quoted writing about Life & faith also wrote about love. o To love an equal, a friend, a brother, a spouse, is a very Human thing. o To love those less fortunate, to love those who suffer, is Compassion. o To love those who succeed when we fail is rare. The world is bewildered and awed by Saints, uncertain whether to envy. o To love those who undermine, who inflict pain, who have hurt you, to love an enemy is God’s love, which conquers the world. Phillip Yancey writes in his book The Jesus I Never Knew that as a journalist he had opportunity to interview famous people: Sports Greats, Politicians, Authors, Movie Stars, Royalty, and he found a People dominated by self-doubt and worse. So he set out to interview “Saints” Medical personnel working with outcasts, Relief Workers, those who run Homeless shelters. He said he was prepared to Honor and admire them, as inspiring examples; but he was not prepared to envy them, but he did. He found that these who were underpaid, and often unpaid, owning little or nothing, had found joy. Wasting their time on the uneducated, and on those who would never pay them back, provided riches unknown anywhere else in the world. In the process of losing their lives, they found the meaning of life. And so will we.