Intimacy, August 30, 2009

Song of Solomon 2
Mark 7:1-7, 14-16, 21-23

This morning's is a sermon, about what scares and intimidates us more than anything else. Not H1N1, not AIDs. Not War. Not Hand washing. Not special diets for differing members of the family. Not even a new Nationalized Health Care Policy, or modification of Social Security, or frank discussions of S-E-X or even CHANGE. Because that is not what these passages from the Gospel of Mark and The Song of Solomon are about. This morning we speak of INTIMACY.

This is a sermon that could not have been preached a dozen years ago. Not because the times have changed, for we are just as Puritanical as humanity has ever been. Not because of some new wisdom or knowledge, for we are still naïve. But simply because of all that has gone on between us, I hope and pray that there is a depth of trust, a foundation of common understanding that allows us to risk being honest and real. In the beginning of any relationship there is a honeymoon, when we are coming to know one another to risk sharing our lives, there are the decades of giving birth and raising children. Then, there are years of working to build a home and community, to create a professional identity. In all of this there are traditions, some we create because they are helpful to us, most we perpetuate because they were handed down as important to parents to our families, and we continue what we know.

In all of Human Culture, there is no institution so steeped in tradition, so mired in formalism, than ours. We reserve a special day every week and holidays throughout the year for religion. We wear our very best. We approach the reading of Scripture as if something children cannot hear, when we must take a very adult tone and demeanor, as if chanting the reading liturgically.

But the Bible is a whole collection of what it is to live in faith, to struggle with God, to try to believe. Like a Library, the Bible contains Books of Law, Books of History, Proverbs and Prophecy, but also in the book of Jonah, HUMOR; in the book of Hosea, Metaphor and Satire; in the book of Ecclesiastes, Wisdom about life itself; And here in the Song of Solomon, Romance, Desire, Emotion, Love, Passion. If all the Bible were the Song of Solomon, Holy Writ would have been dismissed as bawdy eroticism. But all the Bible is not, nor is all of Scripture, Liturgy to be chanted. The Bible, as expression of our best faith in God, includes Law and Prophecy, and Psalms and Songs and Proverbs and Revelation, and also the intimacy of human love. For what could be a greater reflection of our faith in God than our most intimate love?

Throughout history, people have been so intimidated by the intimacy of these passages, as to try to read into this Old Testament Book, Christian metaphors. The Rose of Sharon and Lilly of the Valley is Jesus. The shadow of the Apple Tree represents the Church. The Bridegroom like a Stag leaping over the Mountains to come to us, is the Word of God seeking us out. NO! We need to take the Scripture in its own time, appreciating the beauty of the passage, without reading in things are not there. This is intimate poetry, of a depth of love a depth of faith, that gives life new meaning. As PASSIONATE and consuming as first love can be, so is the love of God for us. What is rare and wonderful about this passage is that the author describes God in the voice of the young woman, and we men and women are as tentative and shy as the one who peers through the wall trying to get a glimpse of the one they love.

According to Mark, Pharisees and Scribes came from Jerusalem and accosted Jesus, why his disciples did not follow “tradition”? And Jesus attempted to describe that there is a difference between what goes into a person as food for the belly, and what comes out of their heart and mind as their faith conviction. There is a difference between Guilt and Sincere REMORSE, between Desire and LOVE, between Ritual and FAITH. The question is not following tradition, but how do you change a person's heart? The tension is always between TRADITION and INTIMACY, between the LAW and PRACTICE, between what has been handed down to us as Normal and recognized, and what we know from our own personal experience, of what is real what is compassionate and caring in this time and place.

Baptism comes from the experience of John, who called people to recognize the sins in their lives, the sins of all humanity, the corruption of the earth, and to come to be washed clean. We have evidence Jesus was baptized, and that the Disciples in turn baptized others. Baptism is a claiming that we are loved by God. One of the problems that arose prior to the Reformation was that Children died having never been baptized. SO it was that the Sacrament was divided, with Baptism available to infants or adults, but occurring only once, and that an infant who had been baptized when they became an adult would study for themselves what they wanted to believe and Confirm or ReAffirm their faith.

Recall that our Pilgrim Ancestors came to this land for Religious Freedom. In those early days, in many colonies there were new experiences of faith, in a new world. Soon there began to be laws, that only if you had had a religious experience, that could be documented and judged as appropriate, could you be baptized. The difficulty came a generation later, when their children did not have the same experiences of faith, so new laws were written, that only if you were the child of one who had had a religious experience you could be baptized. In this way, Baptism is the parents committing their faith, that they will give to this child what they themselves believe.

I was speaking with a group of retired pastors who described they were just as happy being retired. Years ago, people came to worship because it was Sunday, they knew to rise on the 3rd Stanza, and to sing AMEN at the end of every hymn. Faith in God today is not simply about following the score.
In the 1940s and 1950s families would move into the Village and the Pastor would stop by their home, in the course of the conversation the pastor would inquire if their child had been baptized? If not, the kitchen sink would be filled and a prayer would be said, and children were baptized. According to the history of this church, for decades there was only one Session meeting per year, it took place on Christmas day, as the Pastor recounted for the Elders all that had occurred, and the Session ratified what had been done that year. The difficulty in many communities was that the pastor could not remember who had been baptized and who had not, so we began insisting on baptisms taking place before the whole church, as a community of faith. In this way, not only the parents committed their faith, but the neighbors and extended family did as well. In the 1970s and 80s and 90s many parents did not ask for their children to be baptized, and without the parents consent or involvement, grandparents brought their children for baptism, which the church said no to because the parents were not committed.

In recent years there have been several occasions that have given me pause about Baptism, stopping to question and to wonder and pray, because the circumstances were INTIMATE and real. Our tradition has been that as an extension of the baptism, the pastor carries the child around the Sanctuary to meet the Community of Faith close up and face to face. So it was that a few years ago, a son of the congregation was in worship leaving the next day for training in Special Forces, and in the course of the Baptism we placed the baby in his arms, that as he was defending the world, he should know what it is to hold a baby; as he was carrying weapons into battle, he should know what it is to hold a child of God; as we were committing to pray for this infant, we also re-affirmed we were praying for this child of God.

More recently, we have had couples who had been married in this church without being members, now wanting their child to be baptized. This has helped the Session struggle with the meaning of membership in the Body of Christ. The family presenting their child this day, were married here, and return from Canada each summer, first to have one child baptized, then another, now a third.

Then we had a couple who were married here, and had a child, and the couple decided they wanted to join the church and have the baby baptized. But the morning of the Baptism the mother called, saying that during the weekend they had had a final fight and her husband had left. Because she was unsure what would take place and how she would raise her child, she was not prepared to stand before the church in baptism. That morning we lifted up that void. That if we are to celebrate couples marrying, and infants being born, if we are to celebrate baptism, then we should also mourn when we cannot.

This summer, I have had an intimate experience of faith, that is real, and fitting for our time, though not actually part of religion, or our tradition. A couple were married and had a baby. The couple were going through divorce and they committed that they would not use this child as a weapon to hurt one another, but rather they committed their faith to love this child, to teach the child about faith in God and to learn from her. They invited family and friends to affirm their love for the parents and the child as gifts of God. It was not within the confines of the church, not named as a Sacrament, not using the formulaic questions. But in a world with so many divorces, so many occasions where families do harm to one another, it was opportunity to affirm the intimate love and faith of people for God, and the love and faith of God in humanity by gifting us a child.