Passive Aggressive or Intentional Love, April 28, 2013

Acts 11: 1-18 John 13: 31-35 How do we make major decisions? Not simply what shall we do this afternoon, or what shall we eat, even decisions which are larger than ourselves and our life, determining whole new directions for future generations, for the church, the community, the world? As human beings, we love to debate, to challenge one another and thereby challenge ourselves. We love to amass our arguments and doctrines, relying upon our favorite philosophical conviction or author. But truthfully, minds are not changed, positions are not changed, Glorification does not come by arguments. We are changed by story, story of actions that change peoples' lives. I think it is for this reason, Jesus told parables. When I came to the Northeast the Interim pastor described that something you need to remember is 175 years ago when the great Western expansion took place, those who stayed in the Northeast said to those who left, “You go ahead, follow your dreams, and when you fail, we will be waiting right here for you to come back.” Passive Aggression is one way in which we emphasize our intentions and objections. I am told that years ago, a CEO received a personal check for $1,000,000 from the Governor of Texas, asking if they would move their headquarters. Personal gain and incentive can make decisions easier for us. I am also told that that CEO turned down the personal check, feeling loyalty to this community and the State of New York. So loyalty and commitment are also deciding factors. Recently I came across a paper written by Irving Janis & Leon Mann describing that every decision entails risk and anxiety. Janis & Mann identified that common patterns of decision-making include Defensive Avoidance, Over-Reaction's impulsive responses, Hyper-vigilance's collection of data and studies, assessing Political Ramifications, Tentative Adaptation, Procrastination, Fractionalizing, Hedging Bets, Maintaining Strategic Reserves, Staggering Decision-Making, and only making Reversible Decisions. The authors' assumption being that as in medicine, the professional leader attempts to control stability, while tweaking a single medication, instead of trying to change the world, we could tweak a singular element and witness what difference took place in six months. That paper was published in 1992, before all the changes of computerization and the world economy. In the stories appointed for us from the Bible this day, Jesus and Peter each are confronted with major shifts determining their future, the future of the faith, of the community of believers, and of the world. At the Last Supper, Jesus humbled himself by stripping and kneeling to wash the feet of his disciples. Judas walked out in order to betray Jesus. Jesus already knew Simon Peter would deny him three times in the next few hours. In the midst of all this betrayal and confrontation and escalating conflict, Jesus gives the disciples the 11th Commandment. In addition to the 10 Commandments of Moses, underscoring them all as a Foundation: “Love One Another”. The direction seems so innocuous, so basic. We want some deep involved theological creed like Predestination, Transubstantiation, or Papal Inerrancy, something definitional like Circumcision or following a Kosher diet, instead, what has always identified Christianity is this covenant commitment: Love One Another. But especially, within the context of having just been betrayed, knowing these very people would deny even knowing him, washing their feet and intimately commanding them/us to Love One Another, represents a whole different orientation to life, which can only be described as Glory. Having been without sin and betrayed and abandoned and alone, suffering for the sins of the world even through death and burial, and still loving us, that is not what is taught at Business School in how to lead. But I remember one dark night when my parents had had a fatal car crash with a drunk driver and my family and I were in crisis, and I came home to a dark house and suddenly there was an elder of the church standing in my kitchen. I recall standing before the Dinka tribe at Pok Tap, as the Chiefs described that half of all the women giving birth die in delivery, half of all women and I confessed that my own birth mother had died in my delivery. I remember when my father died, and I could not put two words together, and members of the church volunteered to preach about their experience of faith. Okay, but that was the Messiah and Love, there could not be a much simpler conviction. Is anyone against God Loving Us, questioning that the Son of God sent into the world because God loves the world so much, that Jesus would also love? What about Prejudice, what about Fear, Oppression, Hate? After healing Aeneas who was lame, and raising Tabitha who had died, and staying with Simon the Tanner, Simon Peter had a dream. Recently, I was meeting with prospective members and described that we had recently had a Seder Passover Meal. They questioned that that is a Jewish Feast, and I described that Yes, Jesus was Jewish, the Disciples all had been Jewish, observing the Passover, following the Commandments, being Kosher. In Peter's Dream, he witnesses an immense white sheet being let down from heaven like a Table cloth. In it are every kind of Non-Kosher living creature, Reptiles and Fish and Birds and four-legged creatures. Three different times, Peter rejected what was offered as being profane, and three different times a voice came from heaven asking how what God has provided for you could be profane? After this revelation from God, after the experience of actually going to the house of the Roman Centurion Cornelius and Baptizing him and sharing a meal with this Gentile, Peter was called on the carpet by the Circumcised Jewish Christian leadership for why he had done what he had done. Peter described that his decision-making began with Revelation for God, and that when he went to do what previously had been considered profane (entering the home of a non-Jew, a Roman Centurion named Cornelius), he had gone in the company of 6 other believers. But also, that after witnessing this dream 3 times, and being in the company of others from the church, Peter witnessed that the same Holy Spirit came upon these Gentiles as had come upon the Apostles in the Upper Room on the day of Pentecost. Realize the effects of Peter's actions are not simply that he shared a sandwich with Cornelius, but that Christianity was opened for all of us who had not previously been Jewish. Had this been Saul who had become Paul who had the dream and went to Cornelius, the Apostles might not have accepted, but this was Peter of the original 12. There is a story by Isak Dinesen called Out of Africa, in which the author describes that one day a boy named Kitau appeared at her door and asked for a job as a House servant. Everything worked out well, until one day Kitau announced he would be leaving and asked her for a Letter of Recommendation to the Muslim Sheik in the next Village. Dinesen offered to pay Kitau more, but that did not interest the boy. Kitau had decided to become either a Christian or Muslim, and in order to decide had come to live with Dinesen, and now wanted to try living with the Sheik to see which fit him better. Dinesen recalled in the book, that she had wished she had known this was what Kitau was doing when living with her, as it may have changed how she acted or what she did. But is that not the point of following the Commandment to Love One Another? It is simple enough to passively demonstrate our animosity and aggression by not participating, it is easy to take life and our faith and ethics and convictions for granted but to Love Intentionally is what we are commanded to do.